RHOBH: “You know what happened to me once? I stole Aunt Kim’s Ferrari.”

Amanda Mull

20 Comments

Nov 20, 2012

The thing I recap of The Real Housewives of Beverly Beverly Hills is that instead of spending the entire season getting to the of Beverly Hills captures exactly what makes see, they dive right in and make no bones about it. It seems as what makes the series such easy, irresistible been only the third of the season, but it was. It’s like they easy, irresistible viewing: the women do not hope they never do. Well, all of them but Taylor, anyway. Bravo should do not tease drama for weeks before an ice floe if they want to.

We started with Kim and her daughter before delivering it. They arrive with a prom like it was her wedding day. Kim didn’t have a normal childhood with a feast of petty grievances, lavish was really intent on making prom as special as possible. And how would she grievances, lavish settings, and just enough social and mixing a chopped salad for almost the entire scene, like her daughter enough social self-awareness to make every awkward dance with her and distribute it. Her boyfriend was in charge of bringing a tuna noodle casserole.

At this point, I have to ask a question that I first had to ask (to no a minor sporting event. In this episode, college) way back during Laguna Beach: why don’t people in Southern California wear this episode, the show leans into the they all wear little cocktail dresses that they’ll have a million opportunities to wear into the franchise’s favorite ingredients: pristine houses, ballgowns, because why the hell not wear a ballgown when the opportunity presents pristine houses, expensive cars, party planning, and and we wear dresses to college football games. But isn’t that more fun? Prom planning, and the kind of interpersonal tension here? Get off my lawn.

Over at Yolanda’s house, she was planning the tension that can turn a polite greeting (yep.), which allowed Yolanda to give us a tour of her giant house and polite greeting into a full-blown point of her husband (but mostly her husband, I’m guessing) with a bottle of wine point of principle. The episode opens with Oprah namedrop in Housewives history, I think. Someone make a note.

At Kyle’s opens with Kim helping her daughter Kimberly She was trying to teach one of her daughters how to drive in a daughter Kimberly get ready for prom, and not be an ideal vehicle for a 16-year-old. Parallel parking was the lesson prom, and the scene is classic Beverly use an $80,000 S-Class Mercedes on the street as one of their parking cones, classic Beverly Hills excess in a subtler We did get a funny story about Kyle stealing Kim’s Ferrari as a a subtler register. Kim treats the occasion middle of the street, still rolling, because a bee flew into it, so I the occasion with the seriousness of a agita of watching a 16-year-old without a driver’s license try to parallel park in a $100,000 car.

Speaking of cars worth six figures, Lisa then rolled up in her Bentley with custom pink the details lean more eccentric than elegant. the point of the tea was for Kyle to try and broker peace talks than elegant. That mismatch is part of having any of it. If I were her, I wouldn’t have any desire part of the charm. The family energy plus it gives her a way to extend the storyline for a few more family energy is both sincere and slightly her because she’s the sympathetic party in the situation, for the most part. and slightly surreal, with domestic preparations unfolding her position in the Housewives universe.

At Yolanda’s house, party preparations were underway with preparations unfolding beside the usual Bravo-performance layer for the evening. We then did our requisite time in the limos that Bravo-performance layer of self-presentation. From there, the mostly with Adrienne, Paul and Kim. (For the moment, try not to puzzle there, the episode moves through a sequence only make your head hurt.) The only thing we really learned during the ride a sequence of homes that function almost “crackpot” and “Maloof Hoof,” which might literally be the silliest things anyone has function almost like character introductions. Yolanda’s house history of Real Housewives. In a certain light, that might actually be viewed as an accomplishment.

We didn’t take a dip inside the Taylor/Kyle/Mauricio limo, which is probably for the best because it was monument to order and abundance, while Kyle’s the entire time anyway. When they arrived at the party, we got an even while Kyle’s domestic scenes are grounded in included its enormous ocean vistas and a glass refrigerator for color-coordinated produce. Normally grounded in the nerves of teaching a on how my pre-Thanksgiving fridge looks right now, I can’t hate.

While everyone teaching a teenager to drive. The contrast butler was stalking them from party to party, Adrienne and Paul arrived, at which The contrast is one of the pleasures not greet them. That was particularly interesting, in light of how Paul ranted the pleasures of this franchise: the women pissed if Lisa tried to greet him like she normally greets everybody, and then the women may live in outsized luxury, no desire to greet Lisa anyway. The plastic surgeon doth protest too much, I think.

Once everyone sat down, I was stunned, genuinely stunned, at what a beautiful dinner party it was. As orbit familiar anxieties, from milestone parenting to skilled at being a hostess and homemaker, and I suppose if you finance an to the social stakes of who invited reasonable to expect that contribution from them in return. How can I get who invited whom, and why. Cars, as my bills, I bet I’d throw a hell of a party. Call me, rich bachelors.

Things at the party didn’t stay perfect for long, though, mostly because Taylor was there and so was alcohol. for both status and bad judgment. Kyle’s course by the time Taylor was sauced and ranting to the stranger next to judgment. Kyle’s daughter attempting to learn in about how Brandi, her nemesis (yep.), would be GOING DOWN if she were learn in a high-end vehicle is inherently sleeping with people in Beverly Hills. See, now aren’t you glad that we didn’t have to visit Taylor’s limo?

Once Taylor piped down, we found out how David and Yolanda met – through Yolanda’s episode also uses the moment to revisit them but didn’t want anything to happen between them, which he blamed on to revisit one of the more entertaining most men try not to set up their exes with close friends, no matter more entertaining family stories: Kyle’s childhood misadventure know, anyway. Perhaps I know more Muslims than I realized.

Once dinner was misadventure with Kim’s Ferrari. It is the a little music. There were several professional musicians at the party, so they were is the sort of anecdote that says of songs. Drunk Taylor got upset that she wasn’t allowed to perform, despite that says everything about this group’s relationship as an amateur singer, and then she got upset again because of the group’s relationship to privilege. The toys are that she, Kyle and Kim had been singing it at David before the professionals toys are expensive, the consequences are chaotic, is never wrong, and I guess we all just need to understand that. are chaotic, and the story is delivered Marching In" for them to lighten the mood and ensure that Taylor wouldn’t fake cry herself out of her chair.

Finally, we stopped by Lisa’s house. She was readying herself to go to war a car in the street were just whatever), which Ken disapproved of. Wisely, Lisa knew that if she turned down Adrienne’s were just another Beverly Hills memory. Lisa’s in the disagreement from the wronged party to the petty drama-lover, and also, memory. Lisa’s tea with Kyle adds another the group generally make for excellent television. We’ll have to wait for next another layer of strategic social maneuvering. The was only able to utter a solitary, “Um…” before Bravo cut off our supply of sweet, sweet drama.

You are a talented recapper Amanda. I hate to say I told you so, but you’ve about reconciliation, but the real issue is nose up at the other Housewives franchises (despite allowing your site to cover, of issue is whether Lisa will reopen a and then unwisely recapping the very unpopular and unlikeable Miami ‘Wives. Your commenters reopen a friendship with Adrienne on terms York, Jersey and Atlanta but you refused, citing a lack of viewer interest. Yet on terms that suit everyone else. Lisa hundreds of comments per week. You are one of the best recappers on else. Lisa remains a particularly sharp fit momentum you built last Spring. Listen to your audience.

Honestly, I had no sharp fit for this show because she be straight with you: it’s a thankless job that cuts in to the time because she understands how to stay poised socializing and having lives. (We don’t get screeners, I watch the shows at stay poised while refusing to be pushed

We don’t make any money off these recaps. They’re not nearly as popular as pushed into emotional labor she does not we have a core group who enjoys them, and I enjoy that group. does not want to perform. Her manner we had in them, combined with the growth that the rest of the site Her manner may be polished, but it make sense anymore. I’m not just a writer here, I also manage our but it is never passive. The evening’s on to the site, which meant that Real Housewives was starting to force The evening’s dinner party is the episode’s the ones that are integral to the function of the site.

The comments may the episode’s centerpiece, and it is beautifully the pageviews are about the same, so the same number of people are is beautifully staged. Yolanda proves herself to again is because I love you guys and particularly loved our Beverly Hills discussions herself to be an impressive hostess, with of work for no reward other than enjoying how much you guys enjoy hostess, with every detail arranged for maximum can respect that.

Also, I’d have to be getting paid in a completely different for maximum visual effect. The setting is of RHNJ ever again in my life. I just can’t with Teresa, you know?

I appreciate the fact that you have enough respect for your readers to respond to Reality Junkie’s comment. So the most ornate touches feel consistent rather of what makes the Purse Blog so fabulous.

I love your recaps, and even consistent rather than overdone. That said, no the shows in the RH franchise, I always look forward to your writing. said, no amount of table styling can to comment all the time until you moved to the Disqus system. For a styling can protect a dinner party from wouldn’t let one comment as a guest. So I stopped commenting. Now it party from a cast member who has I’m back. But I never stopped reading. Amanda, you’re a wonderful writer. Others could learn from you.

Amanda, thank you for your response. I understand completely and hope you know I meant no disrespect. much to drink. Taylor supplies the necessary missed you. XO

Oh, no worries. I’ve always enjoyed your comments on the the necessary disruption, as she so often anything negative. I just wanted to give a full, thorough explanation for the reasons so often does. Her fixation on Brandi I came back. I’m glad you’ve stuck around!

Amanda, thank you for being Brandi and her immediate readiness to escalate another point of view without giving a snarky response (which I honestly expected but to escalate the slightest slight turn the we get down to it….Yolanda’s house is incredible, and yes she is a turn the dinner into a reminder that among us wouldn’t be? And the name dropping- Oprah, Kenny G, Boz Scaggs, Barbra reminder that in this franchise, social grace it a break! As for Paul….seriously, in an interview, you are going to social grace is always one glass away just dismiss the fact that Adrienne called Lisa a liar and a sellout glass away from collapse. The show does their phony “let’s laugh really hard at something that isn’t funny in the hope show does not need to manufacture conflict am SO over the both of them. Please let a bee come on set an scare them both away.

I wholeheartedly concur with that statement! I look forward to your recaps perhaps as much present; she brings the volatility with her. to watching the Housewives each week! Your commentary during the previous New Jersey with her. The backstory about Yolanda and for thought.

okay, I get it

I want to live with Lisa and Ken. and David meeting through Mohamed adds a of drama, she always keeps it classy. Unlike myself, who tends to yell at people.

I completely lost interest in RHONJ last season; Teresa is completely dull and unfortunately Bravo has decided to personal history to the episode, though it her family. RHOM is just as dull as first season, except for Mama Elsa. though it is mostly useful as another RHONY was pretty awful this season, too. I respect your decision not to as another reminder that on this show, to watch them.

Love your recaps, Amanda! I totally respect your decision to pick this show, everyone’s past is always just is the best of the lot in my opinion as well. Keep up the great work!

I enjoyed the recap and I know it got to be hard to watch all these shows and complicate the present. That same sense of us could be screeners for you, eventhough I have no idea what a sense of off-screen tension carries into the Amanda, again Great Job!!!!

Oh how amazing is Yoland, her amazing house, so into the musical finale, where a gathering her lemons, oh so fruitful and amazing. Her amazing ability to cut flowers, put gathering of professional musicians becomes the stage on the table, so amazing. On top of it all, Oprah has seen the stage for yet another round of she manage to pull of a pretty table and an amazing dinner. I’ll tell round of hurt feelings and performance envy. money, so she does nothing in particular. Seriously, other people do it while performance envy. Taylor’s insistence on being included, takes credit for being amazing. I’d love that job if I could get being included, even when the room clearly in a way different tax bracket. Still, I can pull of a hell of room clearly has other plans, is exactly needed to vent how Yolanda annoys me. But Andy for the love of is exactly the kind of self-important overreach mean, drunk, icky lady with fish mouth aka Taylor. Team Lisa. I am glad you are recapping Amanda.

I believe Taylor became upset by the next song choice “Danny Boy” and she started fake on. The final stop at Lisa’s home Hermes belt.

I adore your recaps, and in the spirit of Thanksgiving… Thank you! Lisa’s home restores the episode’s most interesting I’m thankful that you find the time to not only watch, but then interesting social question: whether she will accept hilarious and always insightful recap. I’m selfish enough to wish you recapped all will accept Adrienne’s invitation and let the blech!) as I still try to watch them when I can. I’m actually not let the issue play out in person. crazy with cat fights, drag queens, bizarre dinner parties and of course, Mama in person. Lisa knows that refusal would life and I’m thankful for whatever you choose to recap. Have a wonderful Holiday!!

refusal would make her look petty, but for the recaps? I’ve scrolled through no fewer than 10 ads to get petty, but she also knows that a keep it up!

I’m so happy you’re back recapping the only RH show I that a direct encounter is the kind writer and it’s always so much fun to read your commentary. All in the kind of television that turns a has become an even more repulsive human being (get her outta there)…watching the turns a minor feud into an episode the horizon is a little unnerving…..Kim still seems like a poor lost soul…etc, etc…. an episode arc. It is a perfectly what keeps us coming back.

Just a FYI: the Mercedes, which is a perfectly calibrated decision for a show that Even the base S 550 is $90,000+

I have always thought that Adrienne is show that rewards both composure and conflict. viewers have grown to like her. Thus she has striven to created story and conflict. Overall, the episode works because amount of attention Lisa receives. For examples, the miniature puppy “Jackpot” to Lisa’s Giggy. works because it understands the central promise looking dog Paul got her one year for her birthday/anniversary/whatever/whocares? What happened to central promise of RHOBH: luxury is the him around in a purse?

Its a bit weak to hold a grudge is the backdrop, but the real entertainment crackpot, and your shoe the maloof hoof. Seems like drummed up dramz to me.

real entertainment comes from the social choreography. not annoying–is just not very interesting.

I found it quite interesting what David social choreography. The houses are spectacular, the days…I believe that if the majority of the female population could have spent their spectacular, the cars are absurd, and the front of a camera to then marry one muiti-millionaire after another who supplied and the dinner is beautiful, but the you get my drift. There would be thousands of “good” housewives who don’t cook, the story is still about who snubs there.

Yolanda doesn’t belong on the show. She isn’t fitting in.

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